Monday, November 15, 2010

To online date? Or to not online date?

First and foremost, this is my personal experience, don't let me hinder you or sway you in your decision to online date. Now that after that, I shall now share my experience with you all. Brace yourself...

...Let's start with...
 eHARMONY!
First and foremost eHarmony is expensive, I signed up for a 3 months stint paying about 60 bucks a month for 3 months. By the end of my sign up and getting the secure profile I spent over 200 dollars in 3 months, and lets say it wasn't worth it. Like seriously wasn't worth it, I could have taken myself on an EXPENSIVE date, and had money left over. Lets not forget the key part.. I would have enjoyed myself.

I went on 2 dates in those three months. First of all, you guys know me. I am 6ft tall woman! All the guys were under 6ft. I remember calling eHarmony and complaining. I was so upset bc to me I was dishing out a lot of money, and not getting any decent prospects. I'm like I'm sorry, I'm 6ft tall, I'm not dating better yet considering dating anyone that's 5'2. The operators response? Love comes in all shapes and sizes, if you really fall in love, that wont matter. My response, so you're telling me that you want me to settle? See that's what I hate about these sites, bc I felt like I had to settle. I felt like I had already said I accepted all races, all religious, and it didn't matter if they guy had kids. You know that's just not me. My guy criteria is pretty simple.

1. Be over 6ft tall.
2. Have a great sense of humor.
3. Be a man of Christ.
4. Have a stable job.
5. Have his own car.
6. Have an education.

To me, that list is pretty simple. But that operator pissed me off something good. I was like I want my money back trick LOL! But I was so serious. So shortly after that I connected with this guy. He was OVER 6ft, and everything else was down hill, but thought I'd give him a chance. God, the way he described himself over eharmony, and over the phone, and everything else made me soooo thinking maybe this could be good. Lord have mercy, when I met him in person.. I was disgusted. He looked trashy, like seriously, acted trashy, and just everything about him was bull. Im like WHO are you?!? I know I sound bad, but im not saying you have to be all that and a bag of chips, but dang he was salty! And he looked NOTHING like his picture on eHarmony. That was a bust not the looking part, but the whole package.

So I left him alone, and started talking to this other guy, he seemed soo cool, I decided i didn't wanna waste 4 weeks like the last one getting to know someone, so I met him 3 days after talking to him. Though he wasn't EXACTLY how he  described AT ALL I continued to date him. He was soo interesting, and I was intrigued by him. He was the opposite of everything that I wanted and I decided that maybe that was my problem, that I needed to try something new. Let me tell you, it gets exhausting meeting new people, and trying to get to know someone. This guy was from a difference race from me, so I think learning each others cultures intrigued us both. Well, I was enjoying our month together, and one minute we were cool, and next it was the I love you, we should change our school and work schedules to match each other, and you should move in. When I think about it, that happened week 2.

That's a lot for someone like me who is deathly afraid of COMMITMENT. Commitment give me a rash, makes me feel like I am chocking on air, better yet like i am suffocating. I was in one long relationship, that ended badly and has warped my perception of what a relationship should be like. Anywho. I decided to back off, and the more I backed off the more the guy came back like 10x harder. It got bad, like real bad, I almost had to change my number. I ended up having to pay a small fee for ATT to block him. He then found me on FB and Youtube and kept sending me msgs. You can only tell a person to back off for so long. After that experience I kept paying for eHarmony, but didnt bother to sign in.

I also tried match.com...lets just say that seemed more like a booty call place than a real place to find someone.

After my experience I made a good evaluation that online dating just was not for me. I rather run into mister right or not right, or whomever he maybe than experience what I did on online dating.. Make your own assumptions. I hope it works out for you if your considering online dating!
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3 comments:

  1. awesome entry :) thanks for sharing your experience. I think you should have called eharmony back and asked them to give you a full refund for their bs service. I'm sure you will find Mr. right eventually, as we all will when the time is right or when god has it in his plans for us.

    so match.com is like a bootycall? Isn't it funny how most online social networks eventually turn into bootycalls? lol I wonder what's next after FB becomes myspace lol

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  2. Online dating so not for me I tried and meet a weirdo and since then i stay as far away as possible I do have a profile on singles net i haven't deleted and from time to time check and see who has viewed me I do get some cute guys but I also get old ass creepy men I don't I guess my first experience traumatized my ass lol so am just chilling and waiting on gods timing ! Girl am with you one of my # 1 quality's he must be a man of god that with out a doubt great post

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